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Tuesday, October 4, 2011

I'm obsessive. And I hate it.

Do you obsess about anything? How about everything?

For the past year, one of my foremost obsessions has been KB's weight. Of course it has been! She's freaking tiny! And eeeeeeeeeverywhere I go, I get the comments:

"Your baby is so tiny!"
"Oh! She's how old?!  She's so petite!"
"What a little peanut you have there!"
"My 6 month old is bigger than your 13 month old!"

Yeah, folks, I know.  
I know people don't mean anything by it; they're just stating the obvious. They don't realize how sick I am of hearing it, or care, for that matter. To them it's just an observation.

Headache

That doesn't make it sting less. I feel like I'm a bad mommy because I can't do anything about how small she is.  Then I think, "Wait! Maybe I can!"  

Since the pediatrician recommended putting her on a high-fat diet, that's what we've done.  She eats some combination of avocado, cottage cheese, whole-milk greek yogurt, and regular cheese every day.  Now don't worry, she's getting other foods in there too. She still gets bread and fruit and veggies, just not as much as the fattening stuff.

Then, with her eating all of these fattening things and not as much other stuff, I begin to worry that I'm creating a picky baby who will never eat things in the proper way.  As in, the way the food pyramid says people should.

Gray hair

Part of me thinks that since she is perfectly healthy (albeit very small), very happy and active, and is hitting every developmental milestone weeks before she technically should be - except walking, but we're almost there! - I shouldn't have to worry like this. I have a healthy baby, gosh darnit!!  

Sigh.. We see the nutritionist in 10 days, so I'm hoping that he/she has some better advice, and will put me at ease a little bit.

Stomach ulcers

You see, I've never had to constantly worry about anything before.

Oh yeah, but I've never been a parent before, either.

4 comments:

  1. Aww, now I feel bad about what I said about Aer the other day!! I didn't mean to compare, just that I've never seen KB and you say she's tiny but from pictures she's looks normal size. I just have a frame of reference now. I feel really bad now though!!

    If it makes you feel any better, I worry about Fox every second of the day. I went through about a year of freaking out because he didn't talk...he didn't say his first word until he was about 18 months, and he didn't start saying more than a few words until he was 2 1/2. It made me so frustrated that kids way younger than him were speaking complete sentences and Fox was still saying "dada". It eventually worked out (and now I can't shut him up) but I still worried about him for an entire year. So I know how that feels.

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  2. Rebecca Y. CaffreyOctober 5, 2011 at 11:59 AM

    She's so sweet! Love KB!

    Lily is a peanut as well, but a piggy. She's small and people comment on it a lot, but you know what? My husband and I are both small, I don't expect her to be huge. I think big babies are the norm now so when people see a small baby, they don't know what to think!

    Hopefully you can give me some advice for good things for them to eat. :)

    Love you ladies!

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  3. Aw, Celeste! I'm sorry for making you feel bad! I wasn't thinking about you at all when I wrote that - more the local women who have absolutely no tact.

    Rebecca, I think you're right. I've noticed that it's always middle-aged and younger people who comment that KB is so small. It's NEVER older people. A lady who was very dear to me, and in her 70's, went crazy over how perfect KB was. "Don't you worry about that baby! She's the perfect size! Any bigger and she'd be fat and you don't want her to be fat!" So I think it's really a generational thing. Babies used to be smaller than they are now! And we love you and Lily too :)

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  4. Now, that I have spent some time with KB, I can say she has more spunk than kids twice her size. And she did not stop eating, or trying to eat (or work her cuteness) during lunch. I do think Rebecca has a point ... I was born 5 lbs 11 oz in 1980 and I was a full term baby. No one said I was small, but by today standards my mom would have probably gotten some comments. I'm sure it's hard getting those comments when people aren't actually trying to be rude. I hope you get some good info at the doctor's appt.

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