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Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Do you obsess about anything? How about everything?
For the past year, one of my foremost obsessions has been KB's weight. Of course it has been! She's freaking tiny! And eeeeeeeeeverywhere I go, I get the comments:
"Your baby is so tiny!"
"Oh! She's how old?! She's so petite!"
"What a little peanut you have there!"
"My 6 month old is bigger than your 13 month old!"
Yeah, folks, I know.
I know people don't mean anything by it; they're just stating the obvious. They don't realize how sick I am of hearing it, or care, for that matter. To them it's just an observation.
That doesn't make it sting less. I feel like I'm a bad mommy because I can't do anything about how small she is. Then I think, "Wait! Maybe I can!"
Since the pediatrician recommended putting her on a high-fat diet, that's what we've done. She eats some combination of avocado, cottage cheese, whole-milk greek yogurt, and regular cheese every day. Now don't worry, she's getting other foods in there too. She still gets bread and fruit and veggies, just not as much as the fattening stuff.
Then, with her eating all of these fattening things and not as much other stuff, I begin to worry that I'm creating a picky baby who will never eat things in the proper way. As in, the way the food pyramid says people should.
Part of me thinks that since she is perfectly healthy (albeit very small), very happy and active, and is hitting every developmental milestone weeks before she technically should be - except walking, but we're almost there! - I shouldn't have to worry like this. I have a healthy baby, gosh darnit!!
Sigh.. We see the nutritionist in 10 days, so I'm hoping that he/she has some better advice, and will put me at ease a little bit.
You see, I've never had to constantly worry about anything before.
Oh yeah, but I've never been a parent before, either.
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